Let’s face it. This is not a very uncommon scenario any more. You could replace the US of A by any of a dozen countries where young, and not so young, Indians are earning their daily bread, and the scenario would remain the same. Similarly, Kolkata could be replaced by many of the cities & towns all over India, resulting in the same scenario. Why this is happening, and the factors that come into play, we shall perhaps discuss some other day. Taking care of parents when settled abroad is a multi-step process and you will have to weigh your options carefully before taking a decision.
elderly care at home services
Today, let’s dwell on the options. Option 1: You may be one of the lucky few, whose parent/s are actually part of a traditional joint-family. In that case, I daresay, you would not post this question at all. Option 2 : Your parent/s have a retinue of reliable household help, along with number of concerned relatives, who live nearby. This is even better, with all bases covered, but very, very rare. Taking care of parents when settled abroad therefore need not be something that bothers you.
Option 3 : They are at the mercy of some household staff, who are there because of the TINA factor.. (There is no Alternative) and have to get by with whatever service they get. There are exceptions of course, but usually they get ripped off, and sometimes live in fear of these ‘caregivers.’
Option 4 : The few traditional Old Age Homes, where the services provided are at a subsistence level, with the conditions varying from the bad to worse. Some do genuinely try, but most are mired in apathy, with the elderly live out their last days in misery. These are the ‘Briddhashrams’ that are considered as the last resorts for the abandoned elderly parents and have contributed to the stigma & loathing of such elderly living facilities. When it comes to Taking care of parents when settled abroad, it all boils down to choosing the best elder care services.
Option 5 : The new age facilities, which are quite upmarket, set up by trusts, or even the government, as is the case with Snehodiya in Newtown, which are usually located at a distance from the city, amidst nature. However the uptake of services in these is quite low compared to expectations. There can be several reasons for this. The elderly feel isolated and unable to have access to things that they enjoyed in the city. Good healthcare at home professionals will help matters when it comes to taking care of parents when settled abroad.
Non-availability of good quality healthcare facilities is also another major concern. Having to uproot yourself from your familiar surroundings & adjusting to a completely new environment and neighbors being another. Termed variously as Independent Living, or Assisted Living Facilities, they are nonetheless essentially for the healthy, mobile senior citizens who are shifted out to hospitals at the first signs of illness, and refused return till fully cured.
Option 6 : There are now some local or national level organisations, like ours, that have started providing professional care for senior citizens who are living on their own, because, as in your case, the children have had to move out because of better professional opportunities. Taking care of parents when settled abroad will cease to be a worry once you select an organisation that truly understands the seriousness of the responsibility they have.
The obvious advantage here is that they continue to live in their familiar house and neighborhood, without having to be uprooted. They get as much support as they require, with help being available with one phone call. These companies also usually provide varying levels of healthcare support at home, and help with hospitalization, as required. These customized services, do not come cheap, but is usually well within the spending capability of professionally successful children settled elsewhere, who wish to ensure the best for their parents